Steve Albini, Where the Hell Do You Think You're Going?

I'm just not sure if I say it enough. Actually, I'll take that back--I'm totally sure that I DO NOT say it enough--Steve Albini, I love you, I love Rapeman, I love Big Black, and I love Shellac. Seriously this man writes like the most bitter, petty, cathartic, and universally comprehensible lyrics I can think of. He thinks the same psychotic, homicidal thoughts that you do when you find out that your girlfriend has been sleeping with your sister, but he has the guts to say it--LOUD. Really fucking loud. Steve Albini writes like, the best, meanest, craziest, heaviest, TOUGHEST, bitter, angry, break-up music I can think of.

1. Example #1: Copper - This song is track 8 on 1998's Shellac release, Terraform. Once when I was pissed at this stupid kid (I'm not getting into it) I played this song on loop for like 5 hours. I think I even made a 7-minute-long pissed off video of me destroying the shit that he left at my house, and I KNOW I pissed off all 11 of my heroin-junkie roommates. But it wasn't my fault: I blame said behavior entirely on the one line from the song. But I blame my speedy emotional recovery on the same line: "Copper, you will never be gold." (read more lyrics)
   


2. Example #2: Big Black - Songs About Fucking - 03. Bad Penny--(what's with the copper motif?)--I remember this record from when I was like 16. It came out in like 1987 or something, but my parents weren't that cool--I was left to my own devices to fight off Barbara Streisand and Supertramp. I'll admit, it was hard, so I didn't hear Songs About Fucking for another 13 years. I like 'Bad Penny' for reasons I can't really say here--I can only direct you to watch the video, and if you don't understand after that just go read the lyrics. Sorry dudes, I promised the Orphan Powers That Be that I'd try to watch my language.
   


3. Example #3: Shellac - 1000 Hurts - 01. Prayer to God--The only thing I really need to say about this song is that it's scared the shit out of my ex boyfriend when I played it at full volume while he was at my house picking up his things. The video will do the rest of the talking.
   

So now that we've established Steve Albini pretty much owns at life, here's the kicker: Shellac is touring this year. STOKED. Punchline: check out WHERE they're touring. TOTALLY NOT STOKED. I'm gonna go throw something now.

03-25 Rio de Janiero, Brazil - Teatro Odisseia
03-26 Buenos Aires, Argentina - Niceto Club
03-27 Santiago, Chile - Galpôn Victor Jara
03-28 Porto Alagre, Brazil - Garagem hermetica
03-29 Sao Paulo, Brazil - Clash Club
04-01 Bauru, Brazil - SESC
04-02 Sorocaba, Brazil - SESC
05-02 Berlin, Germany - Maria um Ufer *
05-03 Dresden, Germany - Scheune *
05-04 Wroclaw, Poland - W-Z *
05-05 Prague, Czech Republic - Palace Akropolis *
05-06 Weis, Austria - Alter Schlachthof *
05-07 Vienna, Austria - Szene Wien *
05-08 Ljubljana, Slovenia - Gala Hala *
05-09 Zagreb, Croatia - Zedno Uho *
05-13 Skopje, Macedonia - Club Castro *
06-07 Paris, France - Villette Sonique

Sia live at the El Rey

SIA: The name I’ve heard a gazillion times. Well since our own little orphans Eagle and Talon had gone on tour with her and the Six Feet Under hit single, I thought it was time to experience the Australian wonder-ess.

Last night’s sold out show at the El Rey Theatre opened with Willoughby. A super tall guy with a warm calm voice (Gus Seyffert) backed with another tall guy (Charlie Wadhams) on tambourine and vocals and a short dude (Bram Inscore) on bass and a guy whose size I couldn’t tell that was playing drums. It was the perfect set and they even did a cover of John Lennon’s “I’m Losing You”.

Well where do we start with Sia? As soon as the curtains opened the whole band had on glow in the dark children’s painted outfits on. It was likes these floating cartoons performing. After the first song finished Sia introduced her new friend who had just performed with her, it was actor Giovanni Ribisi’s daughter who is like 8 years old or something. Sia told the audience they made a song together and broke out into a fully structured song called “Little Black Sandals” that they sang together.

As the show progressed the set was dressed with neon lights shaped like children’s drawings of big palms trees and flowers that lit up different colors to the beat. Behind a backdrop of a painted rainbow and a smiley blonde girl stick figure.

Of course the audience went wild when she announced her hit “Breathe Me” and as I lurked across the room I could see a thousand mouths singing along. It really struck me then how powerful one song on a television show can connect a room full of music lovers.

She was such a charmer and kept asking the audience if they needed anything, particularly a beer or a hug. At one point into her set she pointed out some Aussies in the room and told the audience not to buy them beer because they were underage. Then she almost dedicated a song to them called “The girl you lost to cocaine” but realized in the same second into the attempt that it wasn’t appropriate so she corrected herself and dedicated the song after to them.

Sia is on tour her North America and UK tour now and you definitely wont want to miss it, so you better check yo’self before you wreck yo’self. Put an Australian accent with that…